Disparate Thoughts

Thinking About Anything

recent posts

  • A Normal Amount of Opinions About One College Football Weekend

    A Normal Amount of Opinions About One College Football Weekend

    Paul
    7–11 minutes


    With the 2026 college football season looming, it’s an exciting time of year for degenerates like myself. Hope is at an all-time high across the country, the best it’ll be all year long. The tailgate group chats are stirring back to life. The prediction articles are flowing from every crevice of the internet. The promise of crisp, autumn games on college campuses provides a respite for fans everywhere (even if that promise is hidden behind another couple months of sweltering heat and summer storms, depending on where you enjoy your football). 

    So, dear reader, how is the season kicking off? Well, there is a smattering of games in the last weekend of August. In the FBS world, this is kicked off by UNC versus TCU in Dublin. Vaguely interesting? Sure. But far more impactful as the representative kick-off, if you will, of the whole shebang. Other interesting games this weekend include North Dakota State’s first FBS game against Jacksonville State, and Sacramento State’s first FBS game against Eastern Michigan. All told, a reasonably interesting starter platter for the season! 

    But the whole thing starts in earnest over Labor Day weekend, as it does every year. Five days packed with football matchups all across the country and at nearly every level of play. Just about every school plays a game across this weekend. It’s an exciting celebration of the sport and its triumphant return to our campuses and streaming services.

    There is, however, one problem with the slate of Labor Day games this year.

    It’s complete dog water.

    Seriously, go look at the schedule. It’s a mess. We’re supposed to enjoy this?

    Look, I’m excited for my team’s matchup, but that is largely influenced by bias (even though they’re inevitably going to disappoint me this season). But outside of that game, underwhelmed is an understatement. 

    THERE’S ONE (1) RANKED MATCHUP ALL WEEKEND. ONE!

    And yes, pre-season rankings are largely a farce to build hype and get clicks. But seriously? Ole Miss vs. Louisville on Sunday night is the ONLY ranked matchup all weekend. And as much as I would love that to be an interesting game, I fear it won’t be. (Please let me be wrong here; I have a soft spot for the Birds with Teeth.) 

    So, in an effort to help everyone out, I decided to put together a list of what I found to be the most interesting events across the schedule that weekend. Hopefully, this can help improve your enjoyment of what’s supposed to be one of the best weekends of college football.

    Games where the spread (at time of writing this) is within 3 points

    According to Vegas, these games could almost go either way, and could therefore be at least somewhat interesting. 

    Tarleton State at Bowling Green (BGSU -2.5)

    On Saturday at 12pm ET, FCS playoff quarterfinalist Tarleton State travels to Bowling Green for a football game, and a lot of people like their odds. And honestly, I think I do too. It’s a sickos game for sure.

    UCLA at Cal (UCLA -1.5)

    Saturday night at 10:30pm ET. How good is UCLA going to be? How good is Cal going to be? Is “good” really even the right word to use here? These are indeed all questions. To me, this spread indicates one thing: no one has any idea how this game is going to go. Yes, it could be interesting, or it could be over in the second quarter.

    WKU at Nevada (WKU -2.5)

    That’s right, another Saturday night game at 10:30pm ET. There’s a world where either of these teams could make a run in their respective conferences this year. But at the same time, Nevada hasn’t had a 4+ win season since 2021. Maybe this really is a toss-up game, but either way, I’m personally not that interested. 

    SMU at FSU (SMU -2.5)

    Monday night at 7:30pm ET. The spread here is a bit interesting. So many projections have SMU near the top of the ACC and FSU near the middle if not lower. FSU did have a strong opener at home last year against Alabama, so maybe some of that expectation is carrying over a bit here. Maybe Norvell and the Seminoles have it in them, but I’m not so sure. I’d say potentially interesting. 

    That’s it. Those are all the games that the real degenerates (college sports bettors) think are going to be within a field goal. And honestly, if I expanded my threshold all the way to double-digit spreads, there wouldn’t be that many more games listed.

    The “Big” Games

    Most time slots across the weekend usually contain a “big” game with the promise of intrigue and season-long impact. Here are some of these “big” games, and my opinions on them.

    Baylor vs Auburn

    The Aflac Kickoff at 3:30pm ET on Saturday. The game is aptly named to imply it is the kickoff for the season, despite 46 FBS games happening before this one. There is certainly interest potential here. It is actually two “Power Four” teams playing each other. But most likely, this will be a largely inconsequential battle between two teams that will end up in the middle of their respective conferences. Whoever wins might get some votes in the AP poll the following week, but I don’t see much here.

    Clemson at LSU

    The rematch of their opening game last year at Clemson, this year the pair will meet at 7:30pm ET on Saturday in Baton Rouge. How will Lane Kiffin’s first game with LSU go? Will Dabo pull Clemson out of the (relative) rut they’ve been in? This is possibly the most interesting FBS game of the day. If the gods are on our side, at least. 

    Louisville at Ole Miss

    The Liberty Mutual Music City Kickoff (oh look another kickoff) played on Sunday at 7:30pm ET. I talked about this one already. I so want it to be interesting, I just fear it won’t be. Please let me be wrong.

    Actually Interesting FBS Games

    Alright, now that we’re through all that nonsense, let’s talk about what FBS games should actually be interesting, for one reason or another, on Labor Day Weekend.

    Liberty at James Madison (ESPNU)

    Saturday, 12pm ET. Liberty is the pre-season favorite to win C-USA. James Madison is the pre-season favorite to win the Sun Belt. Depending on how their seasons go, and how the rest of the “Group of Six” conferences end up, there’s a small chance this game could decide which team makes the playoffs and which team is left out. Now, I think it’s much more likely that a team from the (newly re-formed) PAC-12 or the American will claim that auto-bid, but you never know! Personally, I’ll be rooting very hard for James Madison here.

    Boise State at Oregon (CBS)

    Saturday, 3:30pm ET. This game pits new PAC-12 guard Boise State and old PAC-12 guard Oregon against each other. These are also two teams who really want to hit the ground running on their seasons. The goal for both is largely the same: conference champions and auto-bid to the playoffs. (Though, I’m sure Oregon is aiming for a Natty, but one step at a time, Ducks.) It’s very likely that Oregon wins this one, and it’s possible it’ll be a blowout. But, I’ll be tuning in all the same.

    Tulane at Duke (ACCN)

    Saturday, 3:30pm ET. 2025 American champion Tulane vs 2025 ACC champion Duke (yes, haha Duke won the ACC last year, blah blah blah). This will be our first look at the Green Wave under head coach Will Hall. It’ll also be our first look at if Manny Diaz and the Blue Devils can actually do anything with this season. There are some questions here, but I put it on the list because I truly would not be surprised at either team winning this game.

    Clemson at LSU (CBS)

    Saturday, 7:30pm ET. Fine, I’ll give it to them. This is an interesting game. It feels like a litmus test for the season as a whole (at least the best one we get in the weekend). 

    SMU at FSU (ESPN)

    Monday, 7:30pm ET. Yeah I’ll give them this one too. And let’s be honest, by this point on Monday, you’re probably done with whatever you were doing with your long weekend anyway. What else are you going to put on?

    Actually Interesting Non-FBS Games

    If you didn’t know, there are more college football teams than the ones sportscasters talk about on TV. In fact, there are tons more! Now, you may not be able to watch all these games, but I’ll still list some interesting ones for your edification.

    Texas Southern at Prairie View A&M (ESPN2)

    Sunday at 12pm ET, the Labor Day Classic. Prairie View A&M narrowly lost the Celebration Bowl last season in a four overtime game at Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta. No doubt they’ll be looking to repeat their SWAC champion and Celebration Bowl appearance again this year. Meanwhile, Texas Southern is a team with upward momentum over the past few seasons. This is likely the most interesting game on Sunday, maybe all weekend.

    SC State at Florida A&M (ESPN)

    Sunday at 3:30pm ET, the Orange Blossom Classic. SC State was the Celebration Bowl champion last season, just beating out Prairie View A&M. FAMU, meanwhile, has been on a bit of a downward trajectory the past few seasons. Whether SC State can maintain their dominance or FAMU can turn their luck around, this will certainly be a game to pay attention to.

    Bethel at North Central (¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

    Saturday at 12pm ET. Perhaps the most impactful game of the weekend for a particular division. If you don’t know, this is the number one team in DIII versus the number two. Not only that, North Central beat Bethel in the DIII quarterfinals last season. So this is a revenge game for Bethel, and a chance for them to prove they should be ranked above North Central. This game has the potential to be absolutely electric.

    Am I right about any of this? Certainly not. There will be “interesting” games I mentioned that will turn out to be completely uninteresting blowouts. There will be games I didn’t mention that will be the best games of the weekend. That’s just the magic of college football.

    We’re so back, baby. 

  • Stumble’s Stumble

    Stumble’s Stumble

    Paul
    4–6 minutes

    (Very) minor spoilers ahead

    Who let the TV executives with all the money decide what goes on TV? The decisions they make are so frequently infuriating. There are numerous examples of great TV shows with so much potential that get cancelled far too early. Meanwhile, terrible TV shows get renewed ad nauseam.

    Now listen, I’ll admit that I am a degenerate too. I watch my fair share of the likes of Love Island and Real Housewives. I fully understand I’m part of the problem here.

    But they cancelled Stumble back in May, and I’m genuinely upset about it.

    If you don’t know, Stumble was an NBC sitcom that featured a junior college competitive cheer team from small-town Oklahoma and their disgraced cheer coach.

    At face value, the story is rooted in a series of somewhat worn-out tropes. A person at the top of their field suddenly gets catapulted into relative obscurity. They need to pull themselves back out and rise back to the world they left behind. And perhaps along the way, they learn some lessons about how to appreciate life and the people around them. 

    Stumble does so much more with its story than just play out the same tired tropes, though. It takes advantage of the standard mockumentary style more than any other show I’ve seen lately, and it does some pretty smart things with it. For instance, every time Coach Boon E. Potter (expertly portrayed by Taran Killam) brings up his head injury or his lack of long-term memory, it cuts to a specific clip of him getting clobbered in a football game in high school. But that’s only a part of the bit. Every time it cuts to the clip, it’s some different, smaller portion of the full ten or fifteen second clip. And the show doesn’t even give you the full clip the first few times you see it. So by the time it runs that gag for the fifth or eighth time a few episodes in, you’re suddenly seeing brand new parts of it. It keeps the joke fresh, and it even adds to the gag itself. It’s almost like he himself only remembers bits and pieces from the accident at any given time.

    Another running joke I particularly love is the pronunciation of the small town they live in: Heådltston. If you don’t know how to pronounce that, don’t worry about it, that’s the whole bit. Anytime anyone on the show says the name of the town, they pronounce it differently. The same character will even pronounce the name differently in two different lines in the same scene. Later, you find out the town name comes from the German family with questionable history that runs the candy button factory in town and essentially runs the town. This kind of comedic layering really elevates the show beyond a “normal” comedy.

    This show feels like a reincarnation of the likes of Arrested Development and Community, which is maybe why I love it so much. It expertly sets up bits with wordplay and bizarre world building. Some of these bits continually pay off over time, and some of them build over multiple episodes before delivering the punchline. It’s a show that doesn’t take itself too seriously while also delivering smart and punchy comedy. I genuinely haven’t laughed out loud at a show as much as this one since I binged Arrested Development on Netflix many years ago. This kind of show is so rare, which is what makes this cancellation feel so unfair.

    So, you may ask, why was it cancelled if it’s such a good show? Well, money, obviously. But besides that, there were a few things working against it. For one, it was yet another sitcom that TV networks have been trying to pump out lately. Many modern sitcoms (Abbott Elementary, St. Denis Medical, etc.) are generally well regarded, but they aren’t as popular as older sitcoms are. The general public is starting to get tired of these kinds of shows, and I totally understand that. These days, if someone is looking for a laugh, most of the time they’ll simply pick a random episode from their favorite comedy from five to thirty years ago. It’s familiar and comforting. 

    Another key component to Stumble’s stumble is that no one knew about the show in the first place, so no one knew to go watch it. Peacock ran an ad for it on their own streaming platform, but I only ever saw it a handful of times. Not only that, the ad actually turned me off from the show. It set up jokes and gave away punchlines the very next moment, making it feel like it lacked originality. As such, I pretty much avoided it for the first few weeks it was on air. It didn’t really feel worth the time. Boy was I wrong.

    If you haven’t seen it, I think you should give it a shot. If you’re a fan of absurdist humor, wordplay, and underrated actors giving outstanding comedic performances, this might be right up your alley. 

    It isn’t a perfect show. It isn’t the best comedy ever created. But given a couple more seasons, it could’ve really grown into something quite special.

    But right now, Stumble is simply a one-hit wonder with an ever-growing cult following. Maybe another network will pick the show up and won’t immediately ruin it. Who am I kidding? We’ve probably seen all we’ll ever see of Stumble.

  • Solomon and Maisie

    Solomon and Maisie

    Paul
    5–7 minutes

    Solomon lives nearly alone on the 4th floor of a modest apartment complex in Cincinnati. Since graduating college a few years ago, all his friends have slowly filtered away from the city. Now, he’s the only one left in the entire state. Alex in St. Louis, Rohan in San Diego, Sara in Albuquerque, Ari in Detroit. Neera is entirely across the ocean in Amsterdam. Now Solomon only has work friends, whom he only sees at work, and vague acquaintances from other units on his floor.

    He is not completely alone, however. He has Maisie, his five-year-old border collie and basset hound mix. She looks a lot like your standard border collie, but with slightly longer ears. Her behavior, however, is much more like your standard basset hound: loud for a distant siren and lethargic for a distant walk.

    Maisie and Solomon are each other’s best friends. Solomon looks forward to coming home from work every day to see Maisie, and Maisie takes her day-long nap in preparation for the inevitable playing and walking that will happen when Solomon returns from the great beyond.

    The pair are inseparable. When Solomon isn’t at work, he’s with Maisie. He spoils her with fresh food and enviable treats. They are frequent patrons of the park down the road and a smattering of hiking trails around the city. Maisie is a pretty active dog while the two are out and about, but she loves to curl up and sleep more than almost anything. She sleeps all night at Solomon’s feet, only lifting her head for some scratches as he leaves for work every morning.

    On a particularly bad Tuesday in the middle of April, Solomon starts considering the mood he’s been in over the past couple of weeks. Then and there, he decides to do something fun on the weekend. With Maisie on his lap and an idea on his mind, Solomon reserves a camping space at a state park he used to frequent. His spirits high with anticipation, he starts packing immediately, despite the trip still being three days off. He crawls into the back of his bedroom closet and makes his way into an old cardboard box, within which lay his old camping supplies. An old dusty tent he got as a birthday present on his 14th birthday from his dad, an upgraded sleeping bag he got in his freshman year of college, and a hand-me-down camping pad from his aunt that was who-knows-how-old.

    Come Friday afternoon, Solomon hurries home from work to pick up Maisie. Together, the two make their way to the camp site, a two-and-a-half-hour drive from the apartment building. The car ride consisted of angst-ridden, nostalgic music for Solomon from his middle school years, and a long nap for Maisie in the back seat, curled up on a blanket. 

    Finally at the campsite, Solomon sets up the tent and the hammock while Maisie investigates the site. It’s a large, quiet spot dotted with trees and butt up against a gentle creek. There isn’t another soul for miles, or at least it feels that way. 

    As the sun creeps towards the trees, Solomon is hard at work on dinner for the pair at the campfire. Maisie sits next to him, patiently but intently watching him, ready for her meal. Solomon locks eyes with her and scratches under her chin, her favorite spot.

    Solomon rescued Maisie from a nearby animal shelter just a couple years prior. He just moved into his current apartment building by himself, and he was seeking some companionship. From the moment he saw her in her kennel, looking defeated against the ground with her head pressed to the floor, he knew he found his partner. Inside the kennel, Maisie slightly lifted her head to look at Solomon for the first time, and he gave her chin a gentle scratch. From that moment, Maisie knew she found her partner too.

    Suddenly, leaves loudly rustled across the campsite. The sound rapidly travelled from a small clearing into the underbrush. Solomon and Maisie both whipped their heads around just in time to see some branches moving in the bushes. Solomon’s heart races slightly, but he knows it’s probably just a raccoon or squirrel. Maisie seems completely unbothered by the noise. Quiet blankets the campsite once again as they enjoy their dinner.

    Before long, the two retreat into the tent for the night. 

    The next morning, Solomon is reading a book in his hammock, while Maisie basks in the sun nearby, drying off from an early morning adventure in the creek. Other than a distant bird chirping, the silence is deafening.

    A gentle rustle from across the campsite invades the quiet. Solomon peaks over the top of his book just in time to see a dark, rusted puff of fur slip into a small cutaway masked with leaves and branches. He glances at Maisie to confirm she hasn’t moved. She didn’t even bother opening her eyes. Solomon saw enough to confirm it isn’t a bear, so he promptly returns to his book.

    A while later, Solomon is gathering wood for a fire that evening with Maisie closely trotting behind him. She intently investigates every branch and bush as they meander through the woods. As they round a particularly wide tree trunk, Solomon finally spots it. In a small clearing filled with fallen pine needles is a small fox with a long, bushy tail. Curled up and fast asleep, Solomon is struck by how well it blends into the ground beneath it. The fox doesn’t seem to notice Solomon and Maisie, so not wanting to disturb his temporary neighbor, Solomon quietly turns around to leave the fox to its dream. Despite Maisie’s curiosity, she happily turns and follows her friend.

    As the evening draws on, Solomon is once again roasting dinner on the campfire while Maisie is sleeping in a soft grass patch across the campsite.  It’s their last night out here. In the morning, they’ll need to pack up and leave. Solomon chooses to simply enjoy the moment instead of thinking about tomorrow. He sits there, watching the sausages cook over the fire.

    Almost like routine, Solomon hears another rustle in the brush near the edge of the campsite. He glances over with the corner of his eyes, but this time he actually sees something. The same fox he found earlier is standing just inside the clearing of the campsite, watching him. The black eyes pierce through his head, almost like they’re trying to look into his mind. Solomon can’t help but stare back.

    Then out of nowhere, the fox takes off. It bolts across the campsite, almost becoming a blur. Solomon watches in awe at the fox’s sheer speed. Then, panic sets in. It’s heading straight for Maisie! She isn’t paying attention, still fast asleep in her patch of grass. Solomon starts to push to his feet to shout, but it’s too late. It’s getting closer and closer until…

    The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.